Don’t believe everything you hear—because you probably heard wrong. Listen closely for the flubs in Operator Errors.

Operator Errors

Years ago I had a summer job in the public relations department of an oil firm in Anchorage, Alaska. My boss told me to start making travel arrangements for a group of outdoor riders we were sponsoring. After several days of booking flights and hotel rooms, I realized my boss was overlooking a key detail. Proud of my foresight, I asked how many horses we were going to need. “Horses?” she asked. “Why would we need horses?” I answered, somewhat defensively, “Well, what else would they be riding?” She burst out laughing, and only when she had regained her breath did she manage to explain that we were sponsoring a group of outdoor writers.
—Rob

My three-year-old son was running around the house naked. “You’re in your birthday suit,” I said. For the next few months, whenever he was naked, my son would proudly announce, “Birthday soup!”
—Tracy

I was calling the hostess to ask for directions to the party, but as soon as the phone was picked up, my boyfriend said something right into my ear. I could distinguish the sound of someone answering the phone, but not the voice. “Susie?” I asked. A very deep voice answered, “No, this is John.”
—Annie

My four-year-old son had clearly been watching too many nature shows. He suddenly let out a loud trumpet, then grinned and explained that it was “an elephant meeting call.”
—Jim

My husband was complaining about back pain, so I said, soothingly, “It sounds like you need some sympathy.” In his anguish, he muttered, “Symphony? Why would I need a symphony?”
—Katya

The week before I turned 40, my young daughter caught me anxiously peering into the mirror, checking for wrinkles. “Mommy,” she said, helpfully, “you should just use what Grandma uses: Oil of Delay.”
—Kelly

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