Some people are read the riot act; for others, reading is the riot act. Learn how they’re moving their lips in Warp Reads.

Warp Reads

In a stack of articles, I happened to glance at one titled “What Babies Know.” But I was reading it upside down, and I mistook it for “What Barbies Know.” (Turns out, not much.)
—Lucy

My third grader misread the return on the envelope—“The Department of Revenue”—as “The Department of Revenge.” The taxman cometh and he’s pissed.
—Ted

I’d been editing on screen a plan for expanding my company’s website. My colleague glanced at the screen and misread the title at the top—“The Enhanced Website”—as “The Enchanted Website.” That was enough to set us off: A website that beguiles, traps, or grants wishes. A URL to change your life.
—Ann Marie

When an ultrasound revealed the gender of their baby, my friends asked the technician not to tell them, because they wanted it to be a surprise when the baby was born. During one prenatal checkup, though, they were left alone in the room with the chart. Unable to resist, they quickly peeked. They could just barely make out the word “male” before the obstetrician entered the room. They were having a boy! But the joke was on them: when their daughter was born several months later, they realized that their glance had been too quick to detect the “fe” that had preceded the “male.”
—Betsy

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